Monday, December 08, 2008

The Yeetle Box - Butt Bandit Apprehended

The "Butt Bandit" - aka Thomas Larvie - known for making greasy imprints of his nether parts on windows in the north-central Nebraska city of Valentine has been sentenced to more than a year in jail.

Cherry County Attorney Eric Scott says police cracked the nearly year-long case when they caught 35-year-old Thomas Larvie in the act on Nov. 19.

Scott says Larvie was sentenced Thursday to 13 1/2 months in jail after being convicted of eight misdemeanor counts of public indecency and one of disturbing the peace. Attorneys for the Butt Bandit will appeal the decision citing the town's violation of the Butt Bandit's freedom of speech.

Said one attorney, "You can burn a flag; I think you can leave a butt print here or there."

Said another attorney, "This could be a groundbreaking case. This is absolutely no precedent for this sentence. What crime was committed?"

Authorities said Larvie used lotion or petroleum jelly to make imprints of his naked behind — and sometimes his groin — on the windows of stores, churches and schools in Valentine beginning in the spring of 2007. Why he performed such assinine acts remains a mystery. However, the Butt Bandit has signed a $1 million book deal, tentatively titled "Cracked," in which he will document his transformation from ordinary citizen to the Butt Bandit.

Townspeople dubbed the vandal the "Butt Bandit" even though no theft was involved. The Butt Bandit's attorney, Harry Balls, has indicated he will file defamation charges against the town. "He stole nothing," said Mr. Balls.

The YeetleMaster

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