Yeetle Box - News We Don't Need

CHINA - A Chinese man was pushed off a bridge by an angry passer-by after his threat to commit suicide held up traffic for five hours, Chinese media reported on Saturday. Retired soldier Lian Jiansheng (66) broke through a police cordon and reached out to shake the hand of would-be jumper Chen Fuchao before shoving him off the bridge.

“I pushed him off because jumpers like Chen are very selfish. Their action violates a lot of public interests,” Lai was quoted as saying by the China Daily newspaper.

GERMANY - A would-be gangster shot himself in the crotch when his gun went off half-cocked in his pocket. Lukas Neuhardt (27) had forgotten to put the safety catch on when he stuffed the gun into his trouser pocket to impress pals in Saarbruecken, Germany. He told paramedics that a masked mugger had blasted him in the crotch in a bungled robbery. But police found a hole in his statement when they saw that the gunshot had miraculously left his trousers intact.

And finally...

NEW ZEALAND - A three-year-old New Zealand girl bought a mechanical digger for £8 000 while her parents were asleep. Pipi Quinlan logged onto the family computer and got on to an online auction site her mum had been using earlier. She then submitted what turned out to be a winning bid of 20 000 New Zealand dollars for a massive Kobelco digger, the Rodney Times reports.

The YeetleMaster