The Yeetle Box - Trumped Up

This is a top news story!

The current reigning Miss USA, 20-year-old Tara Conner of Kentucky, will be forced by pageant officials to forfeit her crown due to "inappropriate behavior."

"Inappropriate", you say? Yes, inappropriate by Donald Trump's standards.

underage drinking in her home (gasp)

substance abuse (oh my)

failing to make Miss USA promotional appearances (yikes..that one gets you fired on The Apprentice)

chafing at "other" obligations (chafing? you can get fired for a skin disorder?")

nonstop nightclubbing

generally behaving like a damned 20-year-old.

Donald Trump, who owns the Miss USA pageant, weighed in on the matter, stating "reports that Miss USA is being 'dethroned' are absolutely not true. [Conner is] going through some personal problems and difficulties right now which could affect her ability to reign. We are right now looking into what we can do to work with her and what we will do about her reign going forward."

Her reign? Donald, you've grown soft. Geez, whatever happened to the goood ol' days when you'd just look at her and say, "You're fired."

Paegent officials stated they're giving the crown to the first runner-up, Tamiko Nash of California. According to TMZ, Nash was contacted by a "high-ranking" pageant official and informed that she will take the crown when Trump makes the official announcement next week.

"You know," said Trump, "California has better behaved young adults than trailer trash from Kentucky. I'm not prejudiced. It's just a fact."

The Yeetle Box
The Yeetle Box