Yeetle Box - Former DNC Chairmen Whine To Superdelegates

Senator Hillary Clinton's campaign released a letter from a group of other former party chairs, who argue that she would have a better chance of defeating Sen. John McCain in the general election than would Sen. Barack Obama and urged superdelegates to support her...just because.

The letter, addressed to members of the Democratic National Committee, came a day after Joe Andrew, who led the DNC during Bill Clinton's presidency, switched his support from the senator from New York to Obama. Andrew said it is time to bring the nomination battle to a close to avoid damaging the party's chances of winning in November.

The letter came hours after the Obama campaign announced that another former DNC chair, Paul G. Kirk Jr., had endorsed the senator from Illinois.

The Clinton campaign has argued vigorously that THIS letter should persuade superdelegates to side with her or she will continue her campaign well after January 2009.

Campaign insiders hinted that Senator Clinton has reached a transformative point in her life, grounded in running for office as her life's purpose and cause. They were quick to point out that just as Mother Theresa had no delusions of ending poverty, still, she made her life's work by helping the impoverished.

Mother Theresa rose from her grave and slapped Senator Clinton in the face.

The "new" letter pointed to Hillary Clinton's victories in some of the biggest states as evidence of her broad appeal and said she has demonstrated the kind of support critical to winning a general election - pledged delegates and popular vote and number of contests won aside.

"Her base of support includes women, Hispanics, seniors, Catholics, middle and low income Americans, and rural, suburban and urban voters," the former party leaders wrote. "We like to call her the Senior Senator Senorita (may God bless her soul) Maria. That's a formidable coalition, and we're not even counting Asians or African-Americans! This coalition of the unwilling tailor-made for victory in a November general election - or sooner. We know they will vote for her. We pray they will vote for her. In fact, once you see the light, the vision of a woman forever hounding you to vote for her, you tend to say to yourself, 'FOR ALL THAT IS GOOD AND DECENT, PLEASE, GOD, GIVE HER THE NOMINATION AND END OUR MISERY FOREVER!'"

The letter ends cryptically.

"p.s. We're being held hostage in a basement in a building in Harlem, and Bill is doing funny things with his finger."

"p.p.s. Hillary doesn't approve this message. Not really."

The signatories, all previously announced Clinton supporters, and, therefore, not surprising nor interesting, were:

(YAAAAAAAWWWWNNNNNN)

Pennsylvania Gov. Edward Rendell, Clinton campaign chairman

Terence R. McAuliffe

Don Fowler

Kenneth Curtis

Charles Manatt

Debra DeLee

Steven Grossman and

the family of the late Ron Brown

Abraham Lincoln

Omar Sharif

Fred Flintstone and

Beavis.

The Yeetle Box