Saturday, May 10, 2008

Yeetle Box - Jenna, Limestone, and Henry

President George W. Bush's daughter Jenna tonight will marry the son of a prominent Virginia Republican at the president's ranch in Crawford, Texas, under a limestone cross made from Texas limestone.

Limestone.

Texas limestone looks like this.

Texas limestone has an approval rating among sensible people of just under 11 percent. President Bush hopes the decision to choose Texas limestone as the materials out of which the altar has been constructed will demonstrate to the American people that he is a kinder, gentler father.

In spite of that, Jenna Bush, 26, will marry 30-year-old Henry Hager, a business school student and son of former Virginia Lieutenant Governor John Hager. They will marry at an altar made of Texas limestone.

The wedding will take place beside a manmade lake on Bush's 1,600-acre ranch in Crawford, under an altar made of Texas limestone in a ceremony that the Bush family and aides say emphasizes the bride's Texas roots rather than the White House glamor where her parents now live. (Glamor?)

Who is this Hager fellow anyway?


Well, let's see what we got:

  • Birth: May 9, 1978. That makes him 30 years old as of yesterday. This family has "celebrated" a birthday, a wedding, and Mother's Day all in one weekend. That makes them crazy.

    Parents: Henry and Margaret Chase Hager. Father is chairman of Republican Party in Virginia, former lieutenant governor in Virginia and former assistant secretary of Education Department. A lifelong athlete, Menry Hager, Sr. has competed in many wheelchair races.

    Education: 1996 graduate of St. Christopher’s School, a college preparatory school for boys in Richmond, Va.; earned undergraduate degree from Wake Forest University in 2000; to receive master’s degree on May 18 from University of Virginia’s Darden School of Business. Received an abundance of "gentleman's C's."

    Employment: White House aide to former Bush political adviser Karl Rove; worked on President Bush’s re-election campaign in 2004; aide to Commerce Secretary Carlos Gutierrez; summer intern for ConocoPhillips in Houston. Most Washington insiders believe that marrying Jenna Bush is his most shrewd business move in his young career. Many believe that the tutelage of Karl Rove was instrumental in this decision. Karl Rove has an approval rating of 0.

    Future plans: Move to Baltimore to work for Constellation Energy, a power company based there.

    Constellation Energy is an integrated energy company operating in all areas of the energy value chain. We generate, transmit and deliver energy, help customers manage their energy costs and usage, and buy and manage fuels for other power generators. We’re the No. 1 supplier of electricity, a leading supplier of natural gas in competitive markets and largest wholesale power
    provider in North America. We own a diversified, nationwide fleet of power plants, and deliver electricity and natural gas to consumers and businesses in Central Maryland through our regulated utility, the Baltimore Gas and Electric Company (BGE). Number 119 on the Fortune 500 list, our combined revenues in 2006 totaled $19.3 billion.
He's an energetic fellow filled with energy, energy, energy. And, he is not arguing over the choice of Texas limestone.

Limestone. Texas limestone.

Texas limestone versus the White House.
Hands down: Texas limestone.

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