Yeetle Box - Come Listen To A Story 'Bout A Man Named Bush...

President "Lame Duck" Bush will call on Congress to pass legislation lifting a ban on offshore oil drilling, the White House said. The entire building shook as it spoke as Dana Perino, White House spokeswoman took the microphone.

"With gasoline now over $4 a gallon, tomorrow he, our Commander-in-Chief, and the next former president of the United States of America, will explicitly call on Congress to also pass legislation lifting the congressional ban on safe, environmentally friendly offshore oil drilling."

Republicans have called for ending a ban on safe, environmentally friendly offshore drilling in place since 1981, but Democrats have repeatedly rebuffed such attempts, citing unfriendly environmental concerns.

McCain joined in the hoopla, calling for safe, environmentally friendly offshore drilling, supporting the next former President of the United States of America in hopes of being the next former Republican nomination for President of the United States of America.

McCain supports ending the ban on safe, environmentally friendly offshore oil exploration and Democratic candidate Barack Obama opposes it.

Speaking in one of the largest cities in the oil rich state of Texas, Houston, McCain called for lifting the federal moratorium on safe, environmentally friendly offshore exploration and production as part of a plan help big oil in their time of need as gas prices, beyond any oil company's control, keep climbing.

The Arizona senator also has proposed temporarily lifting a tax on gasoline over the summer to give consumer a break from soaring fuel prices but has forgotten that such legislation would not pass until after the summer.

Jim Manley, a spokesman for Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said lifting the safe, environmentally friendly offshore drilling ban would have little immediate impact on the energy problem since, in a nutshell, there is no bad on drilling for oil in safe, environmentally friendly locations.

"The Energy Information Administration - an administration no one has ever heard of before - says that even if we open the coasts to oil drilling, that won't have a significant impact on prices until 2030. By then, McCain will be dead," Jim Manley said in an e-mail. It was clear from the email that Mr. Manley still uses Eudora.

Some experts say Bush could override congressional objections through an executive order -as he has done many many times, but Perino said: "The soon-to-be ex-president is not taking any executive action tomorrow -so chill."


Bush has visited Saudi Arabia twice this year and sought help in dealing with record-high oil prices that threaten the U.S. economy. Sources close to Saudi Arabia and OPEC have hinted that perhaps the United States should consume less oil or tap its oil reserve or build more fuel efficient vehicles or develop alternative energy sources. They also noted that the United States does not receive most of its oil from the Middle East as many expert dumb asses believe, but rather from Canada.

Bush was not expected to voice support specifically for any of several bills drafted in Congress to lift the ban on safe, environmentally friendly offshore oil drilling, but rather will call on Congress to pass legislation to accomplish that goal, a senior administration official said on condition of anonymity due to his soon to be release book, "President Bush and Oil: An Addiction or An Obsession?"

Bush and Republican lawmakers have also been pressing for opening up the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge to oil exploration and safe, environmentally friendly drilling, which Democrats oppose on the grounds that they are Democrats.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi of California said last week that opening the wildlife refuge in Alaska would reduce U.S. gasoline prices by one penny per gallon, and she and other Democrats blame Bush's [Cheney's/ Exxon's] energy policies for the rise in gasoline prices.

Bush has blamed Democrats, who control Congress, for blocking efforts to increase domestic oil production - comparing them to the former Democratic Congress, under the disguise of Republicans, that held a Congressional majority throughout most of his presidency.

"The president believes Congress shouldn't waste any more time since he has already wasted seven years," Perino said.

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