Yeetle Box - Search Engines Provide Vetting for Vice Presidential Selection

Republican presidential candidate John McCain stated on Monday that Google had made investigating his list of potential candidates a little bit easier.

"You know, basically it's a Google," he said at a fund-raising luncheon when asked how the selection process was going. "What you can find out now on the Internet -- it's remarkable."

Aides to the McCain campaign for president noted that they also used Ask Jeeves, HotBot, and YouTube, as well as more traditional search engines such as Yahoo, MSN Live, and Alta Vista, but were impressed with Google's image search and mapping capabilities.

Said McCain, "You know, you can zoom into a person's house right from your computer. You can see streets and everything from satellites far out in space."

Vice presidential candidates go through rigorous screening to determine whether they would help a White House aspirant in a general election -- and to make sure there is nothing in their background that could be damaging down the road. When the selection process first began, McCain turned to Ask Jeeves. Reportedly, he asked an aide to type "Who is a good vice presidential candidate for John McCain?" He received no results.

An aide closer to the campaign noted on the condition of anonymity that McCain has shown a fondness for Booble, and, as a result, is vetting Bob Goldstein, who is self-defined as "Pornographer, author, champion of the first amendment, and very dirty old man, he's our own little weapon of mass destruction. Put Al in office, if only to see Dick Cheney crap his pants."

"We will continue to vet through the Googling process until we find a first-rate running mate for this ticket of change we can remember."

The Yeetle Box